House

If I open the windows and throw the curtains wide apart
I hope that what's outside will draw out whatever was within
But the warms colours painted like masks on the walls
Cannot hold in the reflection of the wind
And it passes like an embrace through my body
And sends shivers through my shame
And brings cold tears to my cries.


No more calls to answer.
Yet the silent telephone only rings louder.


But I should not be listening.
The words have been torn
And yet the pictures already drawn


Just trust the dawning day to hide
What could have happened
Without his pride


All else in a fist
You choose which one
But the only thing opened is an old wound
Your hands are tied behind your eyes
And now you can't think when it has begun
And all you do is wait for the air to clear
And then from his mind your prise
The final glistening fear
And then his sense flies
And the butterfly dies.


Shaking the walls only brings out the cracks
The ground still lays with shallow selfishness.
And it appears to not tremble when all else has
Shone, but even the feeling of the breeze
Makes it with to vanish
So that the wind can fall 
And ignore the chill
And the shouts
And the freeze.

The Fall

Why does every flower seem to bloom.
But when it comes to me, it's already too soon.
I think that it'll be too late
And the dying petals will float into the murky waters
And down, down, down they'll go
Until they reach the feelings I can't recreate
And so they drown in jealousy
Of the things they can never be.

But my arms were never taught how to hold
My lips never shown how to kiss
My tongue in burning anguish, it only scolds
And what I never can have, I miss.

The stem will one day falter
And then all hope will be lost
As with dying grace the leaves they turn
With indifference into frost.

My hands they roam for solace never still
My eyes flicker with despair
Open yet unseeing until
I can feel the emptiness in the air.

The seeds once scattered in the wind
Are now a wasted breath
Taken and then so quickly thinned
Like the blanket of ignorant death.

My feet they stand on broken ground
My legs are tired of the wait
Always lost but too far to be found
Forgotten in the folds of fate

I could pull away at eternity
But it would not change a thing
Only the tears will be there for me
And in desperation I must cling

Myself I wish would shatter
And I wish I was no more
Because nothing really matters
When it's all never happened
Before.

Blood

Just because the sun will come out tomorrow
It doesn't mean that I will too.
I would rather stay wrapped up in murky clouds
Waiting for the downpour of hurt and guilt
Rather than to venture outside of my trust
And lie to avoid constant crying and pain.

The stars they would rather be seen as one
A constellation that shines so bright
But in truth they are so far away
From each other, and all they do is fight

But I am tired of being placed
In a place where I cannot think or be
Who I am without knowing that
They'd rather I die then live honestly

Long ago have I lost my smile
And only bitter laughter clears the air
But still I can smell the burning hope
The ashes of life, are always there

Like a rock in a pool of perfect pebbles
The stone the same yet so different to I
Like the wounded bird with broken wings
Who has tried, and failed, as of yet, to fly

Like a spark in a room of frozen eyes
Where all is seen in darkness alone
Like a lonely lover wandering into the skies
Knowing they're more loving than what hides at home

Like a fragile breeze in a sheltered blaze
Waiting to be smothered in love and hate
Like an abandoned memory following your gaze
Wrapped up in too much pride, to hesitate

Like a silent scream in a silent story
The words they must be left behind
In favor of bloody dirty glory
As the warning whispers remain confined.

I wish I could stand in the way of storm
And then the wind would come and take my heart
As the dead shallow blizzard would be more warm
Than the cursed bind that keeps whats together, apart.

Circle Time

The past is like a broken bird
Now it lacks the strength to fly
But still it wanders forever in our sight
And although it cannot reach us
Nothing will stop it's will to try.

The past is like a fallen flower
Now it lays in tears and shame
But still it grows hour by hour
And rests in our fears
The long lost lure of the languishing pain.

The past is like a mellow man
Who seems to fade until I close my eyes
And then I realise that he mocks
Because he can
And that he is just the future in disguise.

Moontide

Always tired, yet sleep does not softly take me by the hands
And lead me to a land where all I wish can float into truth
And then like lonely leaves ride the waves of time
Back into the past.

The floors so cold underneath my feet my still they burn
When I long for your touch, grappling with my heart
With my face pressed against it, for comfort
As it is the only thing I know will last.

I must take myself in my arms
As still I back away from everything I have not known
And so that means everyone. Even though
I want to understand the feeling of an alien embrace
Still like a useless observer, like the moon to the sun
I skim on the surface.

To scared to dive deep into the darkness
And find what really caused all those tears to drown
In despair, too weak to stand on my own
And wait for no-one who shall find me there.
Too long has it been since I have,
From one thought to another
Managed to move without  breaking a heart
I would say another's, but for honesty's sake
I would have to lie for a start
Too long has it been since I have,
With the rise and reign of the tide
Simply let myself fall and accept the moment
It seems to laugh I must have not thought at all
Too long has it been since I have
Simply looked at myself in a glass
And not scrutinized every detail, every little
Imperfection and impurity, the flaws
All amount to an air of impossibility
And yet it has been too soon

Too soon to circle the endless truths
What may or may not have ever been
Torn apart by forces far greater than what the
Clueless spectator might have seen
Looking with anguish from the roofs

Too soon he decides to take his own,
And with it he flings down the care he had
And like a shooting star he must atone
So he vanishes into the ground.

Too soon to realize how far it's gone
Since all of them were here at last
Determined to keep us all but none
Just shadowing the candlelight others have shown.

Still like a fading blink of light
Every once in a while I look to you
Eyes too full of blackened hope to open
And so with blindness I still search above
Alas, we can only find things too far away
And when we are there, there is no time for love

And I find it hard to accept that maybe someday
There shall be another being that does not mind
Being as one with another, And they won't find themselves less
For the first time, they'll believe what they say
And in time for sunrise they'll confess
When light at dark are all aligned
And all but knowledge, shall curse and bless.

The Waterfall

When you're looking for the impossible
Amongst the idyll trees
And the flowers seem to lose their color
As the wind loses it's breeze

The wood itself is weeping
With an urgency of late
But I will keep on searching
Until the shadows find their fate

In the mornings there is no sunlight
In the evenings only pain
In the winter only the fires, they freeze
And in the summer only rain

I could walk away with pride in hand
And with my memory still intact
But as long as I keep on going
At least I know how they'll react

They'll ask me to stop and reconsider
The wishes in my mind
And just hold onto whatever I attract
Pure emptiness, refined

The cascades of ice they whisper
In a cave where mystery wept
And the eyes of dawn they hide
Inside, where misery once crept

You think you know through a mirror
That was once sheltered by false glass
But the only thing thats clearer
Are the faces of the past

As I jump I can find solace
In the cold blanket of the obscure
And though head first into the cesspit
I am happier, I'm sure

One step closer to the unthinkable place
To the top of such a starting point, I swear I will climb
For the chance of being closer to your trace
But it makes no difference,
I know I shall stall,
Into hopefulness sublime
But I can never find anything that can replace
At any point in time, or at any point at all
Even the dream of your embrace
And the hope that you'll be mine
In that inconceivable place
Just behind the waterfall

The birds they sing of sorrow
And the roses turn to stone
As the waters of tomorrow
Seep into the unknown.