Acceptance

I am forever lost

Within your memories

I can hear in the background

The unfinished melodies

The words to which

Are half said

And half not

In my head

But in yours

There are roses and plumes

Of what is yet to come

Not fading shadows

Or a dying light.

I miss the stop

I don't know how

To get off anyway

And yet when

Ten thousands smiles

Are thrust into my eyes

I can feel ten thousand

Balloons bursting

With the realisation

That none of them are mine.

And for you know "thats nice"
Is only an inch of the years

Where I have been forced

To colour in the spaces

Where you could have been

And tolerate the races

Which people get in

Though nothing

Will be as colourful as you are

I want to steal the essence

Of the rainbow

And force it within me

Maybe then I can

Feel again

The blessings

That such fearful joy

Brought me

Though I can only ever

Think

I could never dare to even

Try, to close my eyes

Blink for one second

Because if I do

I fear

In the shedding of one single tear

My bitterness will appear

And you

With your mirror eyes

And your mirror heart

I only wish

I could tell you

But I can't.